Please share this video revealing family court injustice & a call for GAL reform

https://www.change.org/p/eric-coleman-william-tong-members-of-the-judiciary-committee-please-support-the-children-of-ct-by-supporting-hb-5505?recruiter=64429970&utm_source=share_petition&utm_medium=facebook&utm_campaign=share_page&utm_term=des-lg-share_petition-no_msg&fb_ref=Default

Please sign this petition. Change will come, state by state, if we support it and share the truth about Parental Alienation and Family Court Injustice.  A mother shares how her ex-husband had child porn found on his computer. I dealt with the same thing and nothing was done.  This has to stop! Please scroll down and share on all social media sights you can (Facebook, Twitter, etc.) caution famil court ahead

Evening Prayer 3.29.15, Sunday of the Passion: Palm Sunday

Torn 2 Peaces:

Please alert Episcopal churches about Bubbles of Love Day April 25th and Parental Alienation Week April 19-26.

Originally posted on The Daily Office:

When they look on the one whom they have pierced, they shall mourn for him, as one mourns for an only child, and weep bitterly over him, as one weeps over a firstborn.

Anonymous Gdansk Master, c. 1500: Entrance into Jerusalem (National Museum, Warsaw, Poland) Anonymous Gdansk Master, c. 1500: Entrance into Jerusalem (National Museum, Warsaw, Poland)

Jesus said, “If anyone would come after me, let them deny themselves and take up their cross and follow me.” Mark 8:34

INVITATORY AND PSALTER

O God, make speed to save us.
O Lord, make haste to help us.

Glory to the Father, and to the Son, and to the Holy Spirit:
as it was in the beginning, is now, and will be for ever. Amen.

Hymn: Light of the World
Phos hilaron

Light of the world in grace and beauty,
Mirror of God’s eternal face,
Transparent flame of love’s free duty,
You bring salvation to our race.
Now, as we see the lights of…

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Childhood trauma linked to early psychosis later in life/ UQ NEWS

Torn 2 Peaces:

Education on healing from trauma is a must!

Originally posted on Protective Mothers' Alliance International:

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http://www.uq.edu.au/news/article/2015/03/childhood-trauma-linked-early-psychosis-later-life-0

Research showing that patients with early psychosis report high rates of childhood trauma has important implications for clinicians, a University of Queensland psychologist has found.

UQ Centre for Clinical Research and Queensland Centre for Mental Health Research psychologist Mr Michael Duhig said more than three-quarters of early psychosis patients reported exposure to childhood trauma, including one or a combination of emotional, physical or sexual abuse or physical neglect.

“Those people with early psychosis who experienced trauma during childhood faced higher levels of depression, anxiety and stress,” Mr Duhig said.

“Women who were subjected to emotional and sexual abuse during childhood were also found to have an increased risk of developing psychosis in adulthood.

“Interestingly, exposure to childhood trauma was found to have no impact on an individual’s day-to-day functioning at work or socially.

“This may be due to appropriate support being provided to individuals from outpatient services.”

Mr Duhig…

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12 Signs You are Your Ex’s Target

Torn 2 Peaces:

Important for understanding the tough reality of Parental Alienation aka Domestic Violence by Proxy:

Originally posted on Waiting 4 Ethan:

12 Signs You are Your Ex's Target. Parental Alienation. https://waiting4ethan.wordpress.com 12 Signs You are Your Ex’s Target. Parental Alienation.

Are You Your Ex’s Target?

‘Overwhelmed’ is a word that fails to adequately capture how a parent feels when he/she sees his/her child slipping away. While there is so much information available about parental alienation, much of it debating what to call it, I want to make this daunting world a little bit easier for those who may be facing alienation. Familiarize yourself with these concepts/descriptions below and start to document all instances that fit. It is possible that you are your ex’s ‘Target;’ time is everything if that’s the case!

  1. The Target Parent (TP) once had a warm, healthy, close relationship with the child. A TP may have even been the primary caretaker for the Child, having been the one to stay up at night with the child when he/she was sick, planning his/her birthday parties, and helping him/her with homework everyday.

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Positive Gossiping & the Tootsie Pop

Positive gossiping and the tootsie pop as shared by Cindy from Dave’s story:

Two men were distant, angry with each other.

A third man took it upon himself to begin gossiping in a good way to bring forth reunification. tootsie-pops-centers

He would go to one man and say, “Hey ___, guess what ___ said about you.” Immediately the man became defensive, but then the man went on to say, “He said that he thought the speech you gave the other day was wonderful.”

The man pretended not to care, but his mood slightly changed.

The gossip man went back and forth between these two men until eventually they became best of friends….. Naturally, we would all like to hear that someone was talking us up.

Our children are no different. For alienated children turned against a parent, even more so. It is important that caring individuals are willing to share positive gossip with our alienated children to break down the shell around their heart, and that is where the tootsie pop comes in.tootsie

You have to keep licking a tootsie pop before you get to the center, the heart. If you bite it, it does not last as long and this action is too abrupt. Our children’s hearts are like tootsie pops. Sadly, our children have been encouraged to build a wall, or shell, around their hearts. They do this to “protect” themselves from the target parent, who they perceive is causing the hurt since they follow the projection of the “powerful” or “coercive” alienating parent. (See Dr. Craig Childress’s writings for explanation.)

The construction of that shell has included the constant and intense denigration they hear from the other parent, as well as the covert and overt messages the alienating parent and their new spouse and their community sends — even just by looking the other way. Psychologically it feels safer to remain in that shell. Kids in this situation do not know how to deal with what has been done to them; they are either unaware of truth or choose to deny to survive the painful reality just as everyone they see is doing. If they do choose to make a move towards the rejected parent they are left with feelings of guilt for being disloyal to the alienators. They also don’t want to feel or deal with guilt for their own behavior, such as going along with false accusations.

What is the answer? Positive gossipers. Often it is only because of the intervention of a third party that an alienated child of any age opens up to the idea that the targeted parent is not hateworthy. If you ignore “it” or judge the targeted parent, you are reinforcing the messages the alienating parent is indoctrinating in the youth.

If you don’t have access to the alienated child, educate as many people as you can by sharing information. Publically speak well of the rejected parent — formerly alienated kids have said this is what turned the tide for their relationship with their rejected parent.

Pray that these children can break free from that bondage inflicted on them. Pray they break out of that shell and are able to grow big hearts, to love themselves and to love others.

bubbles of love

And please, take a stand for love rising above hate by participating in Bubbles of Love Day by blowing bubbles on the international Parental Alienation Awareness Day:  April 25.

You are invited to share images of any photos taken during the bubble fest via social media.

Thank you.

Invitation for Bubbles of Love Day

Bubbles of Love invite

Share via social media or print out as postcards & place on bulletin boards in:

  • yoga studios
  • YMCA
  • salons
  • real estate offices,
  • dress shops,
  • coffee shops,
  • libraries,
  • universities,
  • yard/sidewalk sales, please

Parental Alienation Awareness Week is April 19-26.

It’s now time to enter the event into community papers and local radio stations (usually a free service). You may even mail out these postcards to fraternities and sororities.

And don’t forget to submit the Bubbles of Love Day EVENT to your favorite local radio station and community paper for free publicity and greater awareness of Parental Alienation.

Then, post photos on Facebook and Twitter and Pinterest and LinkedIn, Reddit, Flickr, etc., of the event. Bubbles of Love Day Events are on Facebook, so be sure to “like” the page(s).

Thank you.

The courts won’t care when the public is not aware.

Where else can you share one of these postcards?

And so it begins… My journey to help my daughter’s get back home to me

Torn 2 Peaces:

Another parent speaks out about #ParentalAlienaiton. Please share your story so our society and our children will know of our love and concern.

Originally posted on alienationbyparents:

March 16, 2015

I am writing this because I think and feel like I am alone in this battle and I can’t imagine other parents going through a similar experience as me.  And I don’t want to believe that there are that many evil people out there that we were once married and committed to who would use our children as pawns to simply try to destroy you and the relationship you have with your child.

Our first hearing was today after my ex husband entered the emergency order of protection on Feb. 23, 2015.  My 12 year old daughter, falsely accused me of pushing her against the wall and strangling her because I went to move her cellphone that was disturbing on the table outside her bedroom in the counter in the kitchen.  She attacked me, kicked me in my shin and slapped my a arm while I was…

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Parenting/Mothering Advice

Who am I to advise?  I am an alienated parent hoping, praying, forgiving, loving my way and showing a way to my alienated child, as best I can.

“Nothing has a stronger influence psychologically and especially on their children than the unlived life of a parent.” — Carl Jung

village

Alienated parents are often advised to keep reaching out to their alienated child, yet nurture their own mental health and create a positive life.

This feels impossible, at times, and when you do achieve an outward semblance of a positive life into which you continually and constantly hope to welcome your prodigal, you get told by those on the outside — those who have no clue to how torn up you are on the inside, that you should not be building a life for yourself without your child.

Now hear this:  Alienated parents are not building a life without their children.  If our child has been brainwashed into fearing, avoiding or even (often) abusing us via the silent treatment, cruel words, lies, threats, then there is little we target parents can do except to build a healthy model for them to see — even if from a distance.  (And court only encourages hate and conflict to be expressed around the child — and that is abusive.) To not survive ourselves will teach our children to remain under the sickness of the abusing parent.

But our children are what motivate us to create a nest feathered in as much peace and joy we can possibly scratch out.

Experts in Parental Alienation (Dr. Craig Childress, for example) say children who are forced to reject a parent are forced into “splitting” of their personality.  This is serious.

Experts say when kids are put into a position to have to play such a sick role to appease the abusive parent, it causes them further harm.

Experts say when kids are made to do this they feel guilty and so they in their minds must justify their own behavior by believing the targeted parent is really as hateworthy as the alienating parent has said and said and said and said…. What parent would want to cause more harm by involving their child in the no-win conflict. (If you have been able to muster the resources for family court, and won, then you probably were not up against a true sociopath in a corrupt system).

And when you judge the target parent, you increase this hateful belief in the mind of the child. Instead, try to help the alienated parent reach their child.  If you do not have access to the alienated child, publically affirm that the child’s parent loves him/her.  Publically stand against Parental Alienation just as you would for any type of abuse or any “worthy” cause. Judgment does NOTHING to help families. Silence AIDS ABUSERS.  And if you’re not willing to learn more about parental alienation or to take a stand for the alienated parent’s broken heart and love for their child, at least show kindness. Showing kindness toward that parent may soften the alienated child’s heart and help that child open her heart to the love the targeted parent wants desperately to give, along with sharing the life the targeted parent has struggled to build.

“The shoe that fits one person pinches another; there is no recipe for living that suits all cases.” — Jung

Attempting to advise an alienated parent when you have never been targeted by an obsessed, extremely alienating, calculating, and manipulative parent with the help of his/her spouse and possibly other family members, only harms and helps the alienating parent undermine the parent-child relationship. Help by expressing support and care privately and publically to the alienated/target parent instead of supporting the message of the alienating, psychologically controlling parent with your judgment and silence. Point out the positive traits of the targeted parent and the life he or she is trying to create, despite the nightmare.

Parental Alienation Awareness week is April 16-26. Bubbles of Love Day is April 25. At noon, please spend 10 minutes blowing bubbles in support of children/teen/and youth’s natural right to freely love both parents and all family members.  Parental Alienation has been called “the worst form of child abuse” by experts.

PMA International; Love Letters To Our Children Campaign- “Missing You”

Torn 2 Peaces:

“Wishing you well and wishing you back [completely] in our lives.” Love always, Momma

Originally posted on Protective Mothers' Alliance International:

Another original Love Letter from a PMA International member Hero Protective Mother to her precious child. Thank you L.D for your contribution to our ” Love Letters To Our Children” Campaign. We value your participation. Much love to you.

PMA International “Love Letters To Our Children”

http://protectivemothersalliance.wordpress.com/love-letters-to-our-children/

_#4-Love-letters-poem-eye-missing-you-_edited-1

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Reasons a mother cat might “abandon” or reject her young — Do’s & Don’ts

What would make a mother cat reject or abandon her babies? Below are reasons copied from Colleen Dougherty’s article on Cattime:

Square_140_do-mother-cats-hate-their-young

1. Watch the nest: First of all, many people come upon litters of kittens outdoors and assume they have been abandoned when in fact mom is nearby, probably hunting. Outdoor or stray moms sometimes scatter their kittens to avoid predation. If the kittens seem well fed, are in a safe place, and fall asleep after crying for a short while, mom is probably around. It’s best to monitor a nest for a couple of hours to see if she comes back. If she doesn’t, she may be ill and unable to come back, or she may have been killed. Kittens can also wander away and get lost or stuck in places where mom can’t get to them. This can happen indoors or outdoors. So if you see a mom prowling around nervously, or find a kitten crying somewhere, they may be trying to find one another.

2. Illness & Deformity: Sometimes a mom will reject a sick kitten to avoid spreading the illness to the others.

3. Mastitis: Some nursing moms develop mastitis, an infection of the mammary gland. This can happen spontaneously, or from kittens scratching the tissue during nursing. The nipple becomes swollen, hard, and hot to the touch. So it may look like mom is rejecting her babies, when it’s actually just too painful to let them suckle.

Max_200_mama-cat-nurses-kittens

4. Litter size: Too large a litter can also lead to rejection. If there is not enough milk for all her kittens, mom may reject a few to save milk for the others. A careful observer will probably notice this behavior within the first 24 hours of birth.

Square_120_why-do-mother-cats-starve-their-own-kittens

5. Premature mom: A very young mom who hasn’t developed maternal skills may act confused or disinterested. Some moms start out his way and then figure it out. Some don’t. A disinterested mom may also have been traumatized during the birth if she was, for example, not in a safe place, or had difficulty physically. Her hyper-vigilance and nervousness make it difficult for her to relax and lie down so the kittens can suckle.

“Motherhood can be a challenge for any species. Give these moms compassion, consideration, and help if they need it, just as you would for each other.”

I think the author of “Bonshea Making Light of the Dark” would agree that these moms need compassion and help:  “To unnecessarily and violently separate a woman and her young children can represent the gravest form of abuse, with major social ramifications in generations to come.” – Coral Anika Theill

My daughter, who has begun contact with me since running from her abusive dad, my abusive ex-husband, sent me a text about becoming a mother to a kitten whose mother had abandoned her.  I felt this was probably her way of accusing me.  It hurt.  What about the fact that she, under her dad’s influence and her desire for attention from him and whatever else, had falsely accused me to the police and child protective services, not to mention my community, and could have had me facing charges when I also was supporting her older brother? My sons and my mom certainly did not need me in jail and neither did my daughter need to be a part of such a wrongful act against her mother.  Her dad was continually seeking to destroy me and involve her in it. No one would help; they wanted to judge me or ignore the problem:  Parental Alienation aka Domestic Violence by Proxy. Only I understood little about Parental Alienation at the time and just how powerfully and easily teens fell under an obsessed alienator’s influence — the “professionals” didn’t teach me anything except that they did not care to be honest or helpful.

ALL I KNEW was I needed to create a safe, unpoisoned home, that I needed a good job to be able to at least financially support my kids — my ex’s dirty custody campaign included demanding child support in addition to the health insurance I already covered.  I knew he would only become more intensely focused on putting my daughter through more sick hate games if I did not remove myself from his chess board.  I could see the pattern of his behavior of never ending demands, satisfaction, or desire to abuse and destroy me. His threats to me in this regard I knew to take seriously.  I was not remarried, so finances were not good unless I moved where a good job was.  He, on the other hand, was a businessman with a wife who backed up his lies.  He had the money and time off from his business to drag me to court where he could say horrible things about me in front an audience, and our daughter because he dragged her out of school and into court, too. She was visibly distressed, yet the Guardian ad Litem did nothing.  My ex told me our daughter was better off without me. I was very confused after more than a decade of him instilling in me my lack of worth or purpose as a person, let alone competency as a mom. (If you grew up in a stable, secure home and have not had the experience of extreme sociopathic abuse, and enjoy a supportive family, you will not understand.) And the “professionals” in the legal system did not help, but, in fact, reinforced the alienation.  For us to be able to be in a place of peace was my only hope.  And I am still working for that.

Yet, I felt discouraged when I saw her text.  Would she never forgive me? Would she ever understand my ignorance?

I responded:  “What about the other kitties? The mother cat may have gone to get food because no one was bringing food to her.  Maybe something happened. Maybe the kitten was lured away? I think the momma is trying to make a safer home somewhere and trying to survive so she can feed her kittens. She may be hurting more than you can imagine.”

She later responded with more information.  The situation pointed to something bad may have happened to mother cat and that she can’t come back — we will probably never know the truth, the full story. We have all seen evidence of harm coming to animals before.

I responded:  “Thank goodness for those like you who help. Terrible things sometimes happen to vulnerable cats and they need protection from a cat angel.”

Maybe I should not have responded so quickly, when I was still so upset. I hope the message got through that this momma, like most mommas, loves and always loved her but a situation might interfere with the appearance of that.

This momma, like too many mommas, had few options and chose the only she knew in a situation she had no reference for and certainly no help or support.

If that momma cat had been cared for, I am certain this would have allowed her to keep her kittens safe and healthy. Most people are much more likely to reach out to a desperate momma cat than a momma and child abused by Parental Alienation. Most people are too quick to take the kitten away, not having time for a true assessment of the situation and what the kitten truly needs — its momma.