How Single Moms Can Get Through Pregnancy Without Destroying Their Mental Health

Being a mother is perhaps every girl’s lifelong dream. It often shows in the way they roleplay with dolls and treat them as their children. Some will not even let an hour pass without the dolls in their arms and throw a fit if the parents take them away. 

Despite that, when these girls turn into women, they realize that it is not always easy to find a man they can build a family with. Many of them end up as single parents, especially if their partner bails on them or is too messed up to keep.

In case you become a single mother before giving birth, though, it is understandable how it may harshly affect your mental health. You are at the most vulnerable phase of your life; the family you wished to give your child is already broken before they even arrived. But as much as you may want to give up, you should: 

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Think About Your Unborn Child

The first thing that you should think about is the well-being of your unborn child. Many experts have stated that a baby could feel everything the mother feels when they’re in your womb. So, if you are restless, they become restless. When you are always crying and depressed, it may have an adverse effect on them. 

Because of that, you need to try to be happy all the time. Force yourself to feel that way if you must since the primary goal is to help your unborn kid develop healthily. If you need to watch many comedies or be around your loved ones or go on a trip, go for it. There should be no room for anything that may jeopardize your baby’s development. 

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Consider That Single Parenting Might Be Better For You

No woman wants to be a solo parent from the beginning – not even adoptive mothers. The need to have a partner in life strengthened when you created a new life with someone special. However, there are also instances when it is better to be single instead of coupling with your child’s father. 

The perfect example of that is what Jenna went through in the Waitress musical. Assuming you hadn’t seen the show when it was still on Broadway, you should know that she was a waitress with a verbally – and almost physically – abusive husband. When Jenna realized that she was pregnant, she felt so scared about it. It didn’t help that her good-for-nothing husband asked her not to love their baby more than him. Jenna waited until she was in the delivery room to tell her husband that she wanted him gone, but she did it anyway. 

I know a lot of women like Jenna in the world. And believe it or not, it is always more ideal to raise a child alone than to expose them to such toxic relationships. 

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Allow Your Loved Ones To Support You

A common reason why a pregnant woman may find it challenging to deal with singlehood was a lack of support from friends and family. That is especially true if they turned their back on their loved ones, only to be betrayed by the man they picked over the latter. Pride may also get in the way as they want to prove to everyone that their pregnancy is not a mistake.

Still, here’s a newsflash: not everyone is too evil to keep on taunting you after knowing what you are going through. Perhaps your family is upset because of what you have done to them. That’s okay; they have the right to feel that way. However, if you are scared of getting rejected by them when you wish to come home, there’s a high likelihood that it is a baseless fear.  

You need to believe that some people genuinely care about you and your baby, and all there is to do is to let them in your world. This way, being a single mother won’t feel too impossible anymore.

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Deal With Negative Thoughts Much Later

Are you still unable to get over your breakup with your unborn child’s father? Do you often lie awake at night and think about what has gone wrong in your relationship? 

Although I would typically recommend facing your problems head-on, it may not be suitable for pregnant mothers. As mentioned above, an unborn child can feel every emotion that the mom experiences. Dealing with negativity while your baby is still under the developmental stage in the womb may cause complications later. 

If you can wait to do that until your due date, that will be incredible for your child.

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Bottom Line

No one blames you for becoming a single mother during your pregnancy, whether you have chosen to be one or not. If anyone does that, pay zero attention to them because their comments will do nothing but mess with your head. Aside from being healthy, you need to be mentally stable so that you can prepare to be a mom and dad to your baby.

Good luck!

How To Keep Your Marriage Strong After Having Children 

One popular myth about parenting is that children can boost the happiness of the couple. While many couples strive to have children in their lives, having one doesn’t necessarily add to the overall happiness of the couple. In fact, having a child may even decrease that happiness.  

 

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  Continue reading “How To Keep Your Marriage Strong After Having Children “

Brainwashing Children In Fighting For Custody

Why should a child be caught between warring parents?   Why is his innocent mind to suffer the consequences of immature actions and decisions of adults?

 

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It is a heartbreaking scene to see a child coming in front of a judge inside a courtroom, having to choose between his two beloved parents.  It’s damaging enough that the two adults are not getting along well, and these adults make things more detrimental to the poor child making him lose one of his parents.  

 

Continue reading “Brainwashing Children In Fighting For Custody”

Family Therapy

The Basics Of Therapy

 Counseling improves day-to-day life.

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It discusses how family therapy helps dysfunctional family members and the overall benefits of getting into family therapy.

Household counseling maybe your best solution when your brood is going through a rough time.

Psychologists attribute a person’s behaviors and attitudes to how they are brought up. People who have psychological problems tend to manifest because of childhood trauma such as pancreatectomy or parental alienation.

What Is The Therapy For Families

Several ways exist for doing family therapy: some do family therapy online, and some opt for face-to-face sessions. No matter what avenue you choose,  it’s most important that you go and take this step.

Individual Vs. Family Therapy

Family therapy experts emphasize that individual therapy is very different from family therapy. In individual therapy, the individual is the client; in family therapy, the family is the client.

Individual counseling mainly consists of insight counseling wherein the mental health professional will engage patients to talk about life experiences and difficulties.

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Individual counseling Vs. Group Counseling

Individual therapy focuses on how a person can cope with his existing conditions and improve his day-to-day life. Individual therapy mainly consists of talk therapy wherein the mental health professional will engage patients to talk about their life experiences and difficulties. The professional would also recommend specific courses of action.

If necessary, your specialist will also prescribe certain medications to cope with anxiety or insomnia.

On the other hand, families who have been through long periods of emotional distress due to dysfunctional members, financial problems, or sudden deaths may opt to go through family therapy. Judye Hess, Ph.D. says that “group therapy can be more powerful and mutative than individual therapy.” Family therapy involves improving family dynamics and emotional conditions through the use of psychotherapy. The expert usually goes for a more encompassing approach compared to individual ones. They dig deep to uncover a family’s underlying causes for dysfunctionality.

But why choose family therapy?

“Family therapy says there are a number of people who are impacted by a problem, so everyone should work together and support the individual who has the problem,” explains Anthony Siracusa, Ph.D. Each has its idiosyncrasies and approaches to certain things.

Thus, a cookie-cutter approach doesn’t apply to household counseling.

Benefits Of Family Therapy

You already know the key differences between individual therapy and family therapy.  But what will convince you to try family therapy? Here are several of the key benefits of family therapy that your family will enjoy.

1. Build Better Lines Of Communication

Several families have trouble keeping their communication lines open. In this fast-paced world, it’s easier to text someone next door than talk to your father downstairs. Family dinners are becoming less frequent, with more spaces in between, as compared to about 30 years ago, when cellphones were not yet generally circulating in public. Building lines of communication take work. Sadly, a lot of families don’t put in much effort anymore. However, the bright side is that through emotion-focused family therapy, the professional expert will walk you through the process of building better communication between and among family members.

2. Create a Better Understanding Of Each Family Member

fun times after a family therapy session

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When you are born into a specific family system, you tend to grow up assuming that everything in the world works that way. However, as you grow older, you learn that that is not the case: every unit has its system and each member has a different role. That role may have not been communicated well to other members of the unit. Other members may have unmet expectations regarding other members that could cause tension inside the family. For example, a child may have been building resentment towards a parent for failure to meet their expectations. The therapists could act as a mediator during family therapy sessions.

3. Cope With Specific Issues Inside Lineage

At times, there may be issues specific to the family that has remained shoved under the bed for years. If left unresolved, these issues may have resulted in unnecessary tension between members. These issues can be very varied. It can include substance abuse, anger management issues, or self-harm. What experts do at this point is to help the individual first cope with issues. Then, comes the circle. The family members should be able to act in concert to help that particular member.

In correcting bad habits, the members should be a person’s first line of support.

Lynn Ponton, MD points out, “Family therapy also helps create a sense of teamwork and reduce the sense of “it’s the child’s problem, not mine.”

Best Option For households in Deep Emotional Turmoil

Family therapy can be the best option for families in deep emotional turmoil. These troubled families may have long neglected their problems, to the detriment of their psychological health. When children are brought up in a problematic family, they tend to grow up as troubled and distressed adults. To break this cycle, family therapy can help families cope with issues, help them understand their roles, and establish better lines of communication.

FAQs

What Parentectomy Can Do To A Family

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Intentionally removing another parent in the child’s life is said to be one of the most unfortunate incidents in a child’s life. By nature, children look up to both of their parents for support financially, emotionally and physically and diminution of the presence of one parent can cripple the growth of the child and at the same time can lead to mental health problems. The removal of a parent in his/her child’s life is termed as parentectomy. It usually happens after a divorce or legal separation.  There are varied reasons for parentectomy but it is generally done by the primary caregiver parent or someone who has full custody of the child. “The end of a marriage typically unleashes a flood of emotions including anger, grief, anxiety and fear,” Lisa Herrick, PhD and co-authors wrote.

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